not what you expected

you say you choose the cruel way~
but did u think before that what i want?
why every time olso you decide what is the ending?
did you ask for my answer?
i admit that time i was feel very very sad,
sad til i cannot help myself to stand up again.
did you know that time i was tormenting myself?
although i'm tired,
i just dun1 to stop working!
although i'm sick,
i still force myself to go work!
just want to forget the pain,
because this,
i really scare to in a relationship!
被伤害的那个可以喊痛吗？
i want to!
but~
i choose to hidden it~
my heart not wont bleed any more,
just i already numbness~
the same hole already get hurt many times!
it wont feel any pain.......
do you know after exam u told me break up,
that period,
what am i?!
every day just life like a zombie~
working all the time!
dun want to give any free time for myself to think those thing~
i'm not blame anyone,
will let u choose the way u choose,
i olso gt problem~
now when i think back,
break up letter,picture,present~
especially is break up letter,
it make my heart bleed again.
you dun know that time whn i saw dis,
i was how~
i was cried at the bridge~
the first time i feel what is pain!
huh~~~~~~