not what you expected

you say you choose the cruel way~
but did u think before that what i want?
why every time olso you decide what is the ending?
did you ask for my answer?
i admit that time i was feel very very sad,
sad til i cannot help myself to stand up again.
did you know that time i was tormenting myself?
although i'm tired,
i just dun1 to stop working!
although i'm sick,
i still force myself to go work!
just want to forget the pain,
because this,
i really scare to in a relationship!
被伤害的那个可以喊痛吗？
i want to!
but~
i choose to hidden it~
my heart not wont bleed any more,
just i already numbness~
the same hole already get hurt many times!
it wont feel any pain.......
do you know after exam u told me break up,
that period,
what am i?!
every day just life like a zombie~
working all the time!
dun want to give any free time for myself to think those thing~
i'm not blame anyone,
will let u choose the way u choose,
i olso gt problem~
now when i think back,
break up letter,picture,present~
especially is break up letter,
it make my heart bleed again.
you dun know that time whn i saw dis,
i was how~
i was cried at the bridge~
the first time i feel what is pain!
huh~~~~~~

楊丞琳-我們都傻MV

我怎么那么傻~
还在期待会有奇迹出现的那个我，
已经不存在了~

why am i so stupid!

i'm so easy to trust a person,
i trust that she can be my friend,
and i started to treat her as a friend.
but, at last~
what she did to me?!
started,
i really cannot treat her as a friend,
i feel that i cannot face her,
EVEN i do not want to see her!!
but~
i started to feel tired having this feeling,
why should i torment myself in that way?
why should i to do so?!
i told my mum~
when i feel that person is my best friend,
actually,
not what i expected!
i regret that,
i did something that i hurt my TRUE friend!
i have to say SORRY to them~
there was a time that i feel i so bad~
I feel that I very bad when i treat you so cold~
but,
when i saw what you did to me,
i feel that i already disheartened~
if i contineu to do this,
i just will let myself feel very disappointed~
i do not want get hurt again!
i can not afford this hurt~
after this,
i started having a phobia~
this phobia will not lost~
it will stay in my deepest heart~
why am i so easy to trust a person!
why i so easy to let people use!
what am i IN YOUR HEART!

going to be crazy!

Recently I have been busy with my new work............
I can not imagine that is so busy........

i start to feel some stress from work,
every day just thinking one thing...
that is....
what am i going to teach tomorrow~

omg!

now i more hard working thn whn study....

evry day just looking forward the book,

subject~

what the...............

going to be crazy,

everyday not enuf sleep,

din eat on time~
i almost evry day jz eat 1 and a half meal.
that is~
breakfast and lunch~
evryday jz busying for preparing nota,
lunch time going to my aunty office do some paper work~
OH MY GOSH!
can any1 help me?!